First - A HUGE thank you to Barry!! LOLOL...for whatever reason, yes, when I was creating my posts, the tab was on Edit HTML....It's always been on Compose in the past...now why didn't I notice it had changed? LOLOL...duh!!!
Second, I'm going to cut and paste the email I sent to Amy Smith, Chris (cygnet) & Tina (tmarie) this morning about the decision I have made regarding the results from my hysterectomy. That way I'm not retyping this big 'ol long thing again. LOL...any opinions from you all would be greatly appreciated!! Even tho I have made my decision, it's always nice to know what others think. :) A huge thank you to Chris for talking to me on the phone Friday night about it...and to all 3 ladies for just "being there" these past few months. For those of you who don't know, the 4 of us have emailed daily for months now. Amy and I started last fall and then Chris jumped on board and Tina around the first of the year. They are truely some of the best friends a girl could ever hope to have!
Thursday's appt. was basicly just a conversation with a cervical cancer specialist about my options and what they would entail. He also explained better to me the lab results. So basicly, yes, I had adenocarcinoma-in-situ for sure. Two different labs confirmed that. What they won't confirm is the "invasive" part. My chances are about 98% that it all came out with the hysterectomy. That we got it in time before it had become invasive and started "traveling" outside the cervix and headed over to the lymph nodes. My options? To have another, more riskier surgery that would "possibly" leave me with bladder and bowel problems the rest of my life. Radiation (which he doesn't recommend) that would leave me with problems the rest of my life. Or, I do nothing, hope we got it all with the hysterectomy, and take my chances that no cells escaped. I could be ok for years and then all of sudden we find a tumor. If I go for the additional surgery, it only gives me another 1%. So then I would be at 99%. It will never be 100% on my side. So, is 1% worth the additional surgery and possible health issues? Will I sleep better at night knowing I have 99% vs. 98% on my side? Will I still worry about that last percent as much as the last 2%? Well, the answer is yes. I would still "worry" the same at 1% vs. 2%. So, I have made the decision to NOT HAVE additional surgery. I'm going with my 98% on my side. I have a top cervical cancer dr and my own OBGYN thinking the same thing. The dr on Thursday, as he was saying goodbye to me, shook my hand and held it as I was crying. (I cried the entire 45 min I was talking with him). He held my hand and looked me in the eye and said: "Everyday I have to tell people they are dying. You ARE NOT dying." He also told me that if I couldn't make up my mind to have this additional surgery or not within a month, then he wouldn't be seeing me. In other words, if I can't make up my mind in that time, then I have made up my mind. It means I don't want to do the surgery. I have talked with family and friends and gotten everyone's opinion. So, I do feel that I have made the right choice for me. I think at first my mom just assumed I would have another surgery. But then my aunt told her that she herself is a walking time bomb, since she is overweight, high cholesterol, etc. We have no guarantee how long we will live. Now that I have made this decision, I have to just move on, not dwell or worry about whether or not it was the wrong one. I must stay positive and just live my life.
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12 comments:
First, you're welcome. I'm just glad it was that simple.
As for your decision, I think that you have made the right one. 1% improved chance vs a 100% chance of screwing up the rest of your life... I'd skip the second surgery as well and just try to forget about what might happen( yea I know it's easy for me to say it isn't happening to me). That will be your next challenge, figuring out some way to consider this resolved and not even think about the 2%.
Take care Jan.
While no one but you could make a decision like that about your body, I will say that I would have absolutely no question made the same decision. I think you're right about that procedure being pretty risky for a 1% increase of good news. I'm so glad the news is that they are 98% sure they got it all. I'm glad you're healthy, Jan.
Hey Jan Honey,
When I read this post my heart was teetering on two sides of the fence. One side is saying ,"Jan , that is not bad news" he said 98%, that is excellent" , but of course it is not my body. I can see where that little 2% will always be in the back of your mind. But do you know what , none of us are given 100% at anything.
I promise I am not trying to preach to you. Given the same options to consider, I think you made the right decision. I would have made the same one. Why put yourself at risk for a lifetime of complications for a possible 1%. Jan, you are a smart women and only you know your body. Just so you know I think you made a wise decision.
I am so relieved that you are OK.
As for the friends, I think you have more friends than you know.
We Love you,
Pamela
Love you Jan! I'm glad you've made a good decision and I hope you find some peace of mind from this.
Love, Amy
Heyt Jan, you know I love you! You can call me anytime for any reason. Yoi are the best!
Your decision is so sound and right focused...we don't know how long we'll live and have to make the choice to live every day to the fullest. I believe having a positive outlook about it is key as well...sometimes we make ourselves sick or sicker with stress and attitude. I applaud you for staring this thing down and declaring you're going to be in charge of your destiny.
Hi Jan! Not that my opinion matters much since I've never gone through what you are struggling with, but I would do the same thing you decided to do. I think you made the right choice and pray that you will never have to deal with this cancer again.
Thank you for being who you are and a great support and friend to me :).
Hugs!!
You Got It Baby!!!
Good Choice......... No surgery for a 1% increase. Not and have premenant side effects because of it.
Love U Sis. We should make that date for lunch or dinner sometime. I am off work from June 10th to July 17th. Maybe we can squeeze it in then. Email me and I will send you my phone #. It changed a couple of months ago.
Love Always........
Shorty G AKA Sherri G
Jan,
I think you made the best desition.
Your life it's in God's hands. He is who gives life and he is who takes it.
I know he will bless you with many years of happines with your family.
Remember to take one day at the time...
Smell the roses... Run in the park...
Go to the lake or beach...
Lay on the grass looking to the sky...
Make love to your hubby every time you can...
After all, in health or sickness only God knows when we leave Earth.
Take Care
LOVE YA!!!
~Edith
I know that all that I wrote is easier said than done.
But try your best.
XOXOXOXOXOXO
Hugs and Kisses
~Edith
I'm so glad that things have come to a conclusion and you have closure on the decision.
I, too, would not have gone through surgery just for 1%.
And, judging from your post, you are very satisfied and content with your decision.
Glad that this is all behind you now. Bring on the future!
I think you made the right choice, had I had been put in that position, I would have done the same. Big hugs and kisses to you! Love ya lots!
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